Ever since The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom released on May 12, fans have been obsessed with the game’s new crafting abilities. With Link’s new skills, including Fuse and Ultrahand, players are build nonsense like planes and tanks to commit war crimes in the kingdom of Hyrule. But there is one thing people can’t help but create: dicks, dicks, shlongs, penises, wangs; you understand.

Learn more: Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom Players take forever in the massive tutorial area

Critics called the sequel Breath of the Wild a certified classic, which makes excellent use of the Switch’s aging hardware. And with Link’s many new rune abilities that allow him to combine items or rewind an item’s place in the world, people are letting their imaginations run wild. Like, really wild.

Hyrule Kingdom can’t escape the dicks

Link gets a whole new suite of runic abilities in TotK that replaces his old BotW abilities. So say goodbye to things like Magnesis and Stasis and instead say hello to things like Ascend and Autobuild, two skills that allow Link to glide through solid surfaces and instantly build previous creations. respectively. Fuse and Ultrahand are mixed together, abilities that give Link the power to combine items to create anything from giant mechs to pickup trucks. And while people are totally building these things, many players here are flooding Hyrule Realm with dicks. So many cocks, in fact.

You’ve got flamethrower, thick cocks, cars that look like dicks, cock rockets, cocks with rocks for balls-The list goes on and on and on. Hell, Twitter user HKSIcabb even had our Hero of the Wild ride a dick…a raft.

Meanwhile, hideyopo made a wheeled mecha monster that sprayed a patch of hyrulean grass with his water-squirting dick.

What is going on? Why are TotK fans just days after launch stuck on dicks? There are some interesting theories, like a Freudian fear of castration or the idea that it’s all a dick measuring contest. Glamor wrote in 2017 that dick drawings are actually about toxic masculinity– which is not so surprising. Even Kotaku pondered this question in a blog from 2013, speaking to developers and psychologists about why dicks are everywhere in games. And even though we’ve come to the conclusion that drawing a dick is “pushing the limits”, there’s another simpler answer here: dicks are fun.

They are (mostly) hairy and (sometimes) curved. They come in different shapes and sizes and more often than not function as if they have a mind of their own. They are bizarre, serving both comedy and sexuality. And as Maxim wrote in 2015, dicks are fun for “despite what they mean, there is no real place for them in the world, and yet they are there”.

Learn more: Tears Of The Kingdom Could Include The Zelda Series’ First Gay Character

These are facts. Because no matter where you look online, from TikTok to Reddit to Twitter, there’s a TotK dick. They are almost unavoidable now. At least Autobuild’s other abilities, Fuse, Ultrahand and Link can be used for something other than genitals –although players use them for torture. I guess our weird code nature hero is actually nature’s war criminal. Whoops.

It’s May 12, 2023, and on this beautiful day, Nintendo’s much-hyped sequel, The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom, finds itself in the eager hands of gamers around the world. But you: Maybe you stand out. Maybe you didn’t end up playing the previous game, 2017’s hit Breath of the Wild. Or maybe you touched it and fell for some reason. I won’t judge, I’m here with you.

Now here you are, seeing all those cool trailers and…interesting things you’re jumping into the new Zelda game and wondering, “Should I play Breath of the Wild before Tears of the Kingdom?” Should I?” Well, that’s what I’m here to help you understand.

A series purist will always say to go back and play the games in the correct order (which, if you’re considering how long Zelda has been around, you might want to be careful with that line of thinking). But here I will lay out some pros and cons for each action plan. There are valid reasons for either approach, so let’s go.

By the way, this article is a spoiler-free zone. So feel free to keep reading even if you haven’t touched 2017’s Breath of the Wild.

Is the Breath of the Wild story worth living before Tears of the Kingdom?

Breath of the Wild tells a very average fantasy story. Hold your farmer’s pitchforks; I’m not saying that to put him down. In general, the overall story beats are very familiar to almost anyone who has experienced a joint from Lord of the Rings or Star Wars. You have your dark lord, your threat to peace, your amnesiac protagoboy, your magic items of power, rinse and repeat. Watching a short recap video would be enough to give you a general idea of ​​BotW’s plot, and you won’t be missing out on an all-time great epic if you do.

Learn more: Catch up on Zelda: Breath of the Wild before the sequel in under seven minutes

How Breath of the Wild tells its story, however, is something you might want to consider living through, not just via synopsis. Link’s journey to regain his memories has led him to meet countless charming and memorable characters along the way, which will get you much more emotionally interested in Hyrule’s bigger story (as simple as that is) and the people who live there only if you just blow. through a summary.

If you’re just interested in a SparkNotes brief overview of Hyrulian history, a wiki or video will do. But if you enjoy the experience of meeting interesting characters and gaining a greater emotional investment in a fictional world, jumping into Breath of the Wild first will be time well spent.

Does Tears of the Kingdom make Breath of the Wild gameplay obsolete?

We’ve all been there: first you play a sequel, then the original just seems old in comparison. Some sequels improve on their predecessor so much that it’s hard to go back. Mass Effect 2 is an example. Skyrim may be another.

First of all, no: Tears of the Kingdom certainly has its share of quality of life improvements, as in fast travel and cooking– but nothing as earth-shattering as Breath of the Wild suddenly feels Neolithic in comparison.

Tears of the Kingdom does not make Breath of the Wild gameplay obsolete. Image: Nintendo

As for whether or not they feel too similar, never fear. While very similar in some ways, Tears of the Kingdom and Breath of the Wild are distinct enough that going back to the old game after Tears of the Kingdom would still give you plenty of new experiences to enjoy.

Learn more: Zelda: Tears Of the Kingdom fixes some of BotW’s failures

As my colleague Kenneth Shepard told me after his early hours in Tears of the Kingdom, the sequel’s gameplay is “less of an evolution and more of a sidestep.” Link’s new abilities, especially the crafting and new Ultrahand abilitymake it a distinct enough experience that if you play them in reverse order, you won’t feel like your abilities have been greatly reduced.

Tears of the Kingdom is a looker – and it won’t melt your Switch into plasticky goop. Image: Nintendo

Tears of the Kingdom looks graphically daunting for the old Switch, so should you wait for future hardware?

It’s no secret that the aging Wii U wasn’t too kind to Breath of the Wild. And basically, anyone who saw the first footage of Tears of the Kingdom was a little nervous wondering if the humble Nintendo Switch, released over six years ago, might be able to keep up.

Learn more: Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom’s Switch performance feels like a minor miracle

Well, I have good news. Or rather, Digital Foundry has good news: Tears of the Kingdom will work damn well on your old Switch. You can expect a very close to solid 30fps with a few drops here and there, especially when using Link’s new Ultrahand ability. Fast loading times are also quite fast, around 30% faster than in BotW.

Nintendo / Digital Foundry

I hear you thinking, “surely there’s another Nintendo console on the way, isn’t there?” The Switch has been out for a while, that’s true, but as we reported on tuesday 9th mayNintendo has no plans for a hardware refresh or follow-up to the Switch in 2023.

Learn more: Nintendo says it’s not expecting a new Switch this year either

And no, I have no idea what a “You Zoo” is.

How long is Breath of the Wild?

Say you don’t mind waiting for the game everyone’s talking about right now and that you’re cool to jump into Breath of the Wild first. Can you expect to knock him out in a weekend? Well no.

Breath of the Wild is a long game, and every moment is worth it. Image: Nintendo

According Howlongtobeat.com, the main story of Breath of the Wild is around 50 hours long. What if you want to do all the side quests? You’re looking at just under 100 hours. If you’re a completion fiend, HLtB estimates 189 hours. Our own experiences confirm these numbers.

Breath of the Wild is a game of massive proportions. The world is huge and there is so much to do. If you haven’t played it yet and you’re really interested in seeing the release of Tears of the Kingdom to see what this whole Link thing is all about, expect to have to set aside some time for BotW if you’re jumping in first.

Even if you’re not a finalist, stepping into the world of Hyrule in Switch’s first Zelda title is an experience best enjoyed at a gentle pace, and you won’t feel worse for taking time to let everything sink in.

So yes, BotW is long. Which is good, because it’s a great game.

While some franchises can enter at almost any time, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild offers compelling reasons to give it a shot first. The plot consists of standard fantasy concepts, but is told very memorably and in a sight-rich open world that is a joy to explore.

But, if you decide to jump straight into Tears of the Kingdom, a brief summary or two of BotW’s story beats will get you up to speed quickly. And with the differences in gameplay, playing the two games in reverse order shouldn’t feel too strange.

Order aside, another question is whether you should play the old game. You may feel differently, but my personal view is that Breath of the Wild is a truly wonderful experience, from the well-told story with satisfying gameplay, and a truly vibrant and beautiful world to explore, that you owe it to yourself to play this modern classic if you haven’t already, even if you’ve already spent a good few hours in it. Tears of the Kingdom.

Twitch streamer and YouTuber Simply attempted the unthinkable: giving himself just 12 hours, he set out to learn the tricky speedrun from The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, and nail one as quickly as possible. . The speedrun challenge was insane, full of death and glitches to make for a hilarious and entertaining watch even if the feat wasn’t exactly accomplished as expected.

Learn more: Breath of the Wild’s hottest new Speedrun is getting all the hoes

BotW speedruns are absolutely cracking. According Speedrun.coma site that tracks speedruns for various games, the fastest time for Nintendo’s 2017 hit was set earlier this month and currently stands at just under 24 minutes by BotW speedrunner Player 5. This was for the any percent challenge, an achievement in which a player strives to roll credits as quickly as possible without worrying about completing any main quests or side activities. There are other speedrun categories that add extra stipulations to the bet, like hitting all dungeons or shrines, but sometimes you just want vanilla, you know? (Unless you’re a Limcube speedrunner, which recently collected all the hoes strewn around Hyrule in less than 30 minutes because he was just bored and desperate.)

All this to say that simply, a speedrunner who ran a few Super Mario 64s categories over the years, wanted to see if he could beat BotW as fast as he could, vanilla. In other words, he attempted a run at any percentage of Link’s latest adventure. However, to give this vanilla a bit more flavor like a French vanilla or a vanilla bean, he simply added an extra challenge to the mix: achieving a solid time in the open-world action-adventure game as newcomer to the category any percentage of 12 hours or less. The results were fun and have now been edited into an entertaining half hour video that really makes you feel the struggle of Simply.

Simply’s quest to become “the best speedrunner ever”

In April 18 YouTube video, Start simply by explaining how BotW works with any percentage of speedruns. You start by collecting Link’s Runic Abilities like Magnesia and Stasis from the four main shrines of the Grand Plateau so you can grab the Paraglider for air travel. From there you book it to Hyrule Castle to cheer the four Scourge Ganons of existence before taking down the big bad himself, Calamity Ganon. I simply had to learn a plethora of glitches, shield clips to enter shrines faster For the BLSS technique to fly over the Grand Plateau, to complete his timed challenge, all with the goal of becoming “the best speedrunner ever”. But learning was the hardest part here.

Merely

Simply died a handful of times trying to skip the intro section of the game. However, using scope clip And whistle– two issues that lock the game into its day cycle and preserve Link’s stamina, respectively – he was able to leave the early shrine and skip the first cutscene. From there, Simply picked up their first gear (after a few more kills, of course) to continue cracking BotW with glitches. With the help of the aforementioned BLSS technique and shield clip issue, alongside the movement of the wind bomb which launches Link several feet into the air, he simply gathered all four rune abilities to then grab the old man’s (aka King Rhoam) paraglider at the Grand Plateau tower. It was already about three hours into his 12-hour challenge. So he sent it back to see if he could do that sequence of events in under 35 minutes. The movement of the wind bomb made him back up a bit. So, too, made a death. Unfortunately, he didn’t finish in less than 35 minutes, but he was still having a good time. Just four hours into their 12-hour challenge, Simply had plenty of time to beat the game.

Limcube entered the chat to help Simply with his speedrun

Limcube, the noted BotW speedrunner responsible for March’s all hoes challenge, sought to give Simply some pointers to finish his speedrun, which only gets more difficult as you fling yourself to Hyrule Castle and the fight against Calamity Ganon ahead. After collecting mushrooms to cook up some Mighty Mushroom Skewers, which buffs Link’s attack damage for 13 minutes, simply used the BLSS technique to infiltrate Hyrule Castle, dodging all the guards patrolling the area. He picked up weapons with higher durability in hopes of making future fights a little easier. Unfortunately, they weren’t easy enough, because despite the coaching he received from Limcube, including how to perform a glitch to easily kill Windburn Ganon, Simply dead. A lot.

Now, normally, casual players would have completed all four Divine Beast dungeons to halve Calamity Ganon’s health. At this point, you’d probably also have more than three hearts so Link could survive more than one hit in the final encounter. But Simply was learning the all-percent route, which, in the interest of going fast, does none of that. So not only did he have to fight all four Blight Ganons in a row, but he also had to defeat Calamity Ganon at full health, a tall order for even the most skilled BotW players. I’m sure you can guess what happened. If you can’t, then let me tell you: just dead. Again and again and again, each attempt slightly better than the last. He simply completed the challenge, of course, but not in 12 hours or less as he had hoped. Instead, Simply’s last time to learn and complete a run at any percentage was around 12 hours and 40 minutes. His total speedrun time? Just under five hours. It’s not the fastest BotW speedrun, but hey, at least it did, and it’s probably faster than most of us could have too.

Kotaku has reached out to Simply for comment.

Learn more: Breath of the Wild’s greatest stuntman is back, and better than ever

I love stuff like that. The determination it takes to push through despite the insurmountable, if self-imposed, challenge before you. It’s amazing to see, especially considering that Simply could have given up on the feat once the going got tough. But he did not do it. It’s a good reminder that anything can be done if you try hard enough…and get a little coaching from a speedrunning master.

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom is almost here, and at first glance the enigmatic faction called Zonai could play a big part in the sequel after mostly existing in the background of Breath of the Wild. If you feel like you walked into something or missed a big storyline in the last game, don’t worry. Despite many theories being hatched over the years, even the biggest Zelda fans don’t have many concrete details about who or what the Zonai were. But let’s break down what we know and why fans think the Zonai are becoming a key player in Tears of the Kingdom.

What do we already know about the Zonai?

In Breath of the Wild, the Zonai are depicted as a tribe that no longer exists within Hyrule, but their nature is apparently up for debate in the game world. They are depicted as both a savage tribe of barbarians , as well as strong magic users who worship animals, especially Farosh, a water dragon that can be found in places like the Gerudo Highlands. Traces of their existence can be seen in places like the Zonai Ruins in the southern area of ​​the map, with long-abandoned architecture hinting at their reverence for Hyrule’s wildlife. In the story and art book The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild – Creating a Champion, it is revealed that the animals that feature prominently in what remains of Zonai’s house refer to the three rooms of the Triforce: a dragon for Courage, an owl for Wisdom, and a boar for Power. Beyond the animals, the Zonai also have their own spiral-like crest, seen on architecture associated with the tribe.

Beyond that, Link can acquire Barbarian armor in Breath of the Wild that is said to have been worn by members of the Zonai long ago after navigating specific labyrinths believed to have been built by the tribe. While it all fits together, much of what we know about the tribe is speculation fueled by the game’s ambient storytelling. It’s a very minimalistic, FromSoftware-style approach to world-building and largely rewards those who want to explore the big game world. However, it could pay off for all of us in Tears of the Kingdom.

Nintendo of America

Why do fans think Tears of the Kingdom will involve the Zonai?

Theories that the Zonai would be a major player in Tears of the Kingdom have been rumored since the game’s reveal in 2019 due to the emphasis on the spiral pattern at the heart of Zonai architecture. However, the connection is much more concrete now thanks to the latest gameplay showcase. During this stream, Nintendo revealed that the Zonai were tied to the events of Tears of the Kingdom via a piece of loot. In the 10-minute gameplay trailer, Link defeats an enemy in the Sky Floating Islands and drops an item called Zonai Charge. The video doesn’t dwell on the object, but it clearly has the same green energy seen powering up the machine-like enemies Link is fighting, the (broken) seal around Ganondorf seen in the original trailer, and the Link’s corrupted and shiny arm.

Will we encounter the Zonai in Tears of the Kingdom?

Given Nintendo’s silence regarding the story of Tears of the Kingdom, it’s hard to say whether or not Link will encounter a member of the Zonai tribe. Given that the group seems to have disappeared entirely from Hyrule in Breath of the Wild, with the only information we have about them coming from theories and their remaining architecture, it seems more logical that the Zonai were wiped out or went into hiding. . But even so, their technology and magic are still present and causing problems for our hero in Tears of the Kingdom. That being said, it’s not entirely out of the question that some survived and waited for the events of this game to unfold. The series is also no stranger to time travel, as it’s a key mainstay in games like Ocarina of Time and Oracle of Ages. So there’s a chance that Link could come face to face with the Zonai during their prime, but it’s unconfirmed.

Wait, how does Twilight Princess play into all of this?

Like most of the possibilities discussed here, the connection between The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess and Tears of the Kingdom is still speculation, but fans believe they have found connections between the Zonai and the Twili, which were introduced in Twilight Princess. . Breath of the Wild incorporates multiple tribes and species of life from the series, from the Sheikah to the Zora. The Twili, however, are notably absent, but given the similarities to the architecture and magic seen in Tears of the Kingdom and that of the Twili, fans believe the Zonai might be the original race that were turned into monsters by Zant in Twilight Princess. There are even breakdowns of iconography and sigils throughout Breath of the Wild which look a lot like the images from Twilight Princess. It’s all theory at this point, and Breath of the Wild itself doesn’t do much to make this possible connection directly apparent. So don’t feel like you’ve completely missed out on a potential connection. That’s all the fan interpretation, for now.

Whatever the Zonai are, it looks like they will at least be part of the larger Tears of the Kingdom setup. Whether we’ll encounter one remains to be seen, but we’ll find out when the game hits Switch on May 12.

Screenshot: YouTube

Corsair has publicly apologized after a “staff member” was caught last week calling sections of reviews of the latest RTX 4090 graphics card – reviews by Nexus and Guru3D gamers – “total bullshit “.

The drama came last week when hugely popular hardware channel Gamers Nexus posted a review (and some benchmarks) of the NVIDIA GeForce RTX 4090 Founders Edition. In this video they say that plugging in just three of the board’s four cables (in case your PSU for some reason only has room for three 8-pin connections) will lock you in 100% of performance, and that only by plugging in all four are you allowed to overclock the card. Guru3D’s the review says pretty much the same thing.

Shortly after, Discord comments left by a Corsair staff member went viral. They called the claims by Gamers Nexus and Guru3D “total bullshit” and “misinformation”, while saying that users and “the press” were “confused” about the card’s power and overclocking claims. . The full comments, as shared by Gamers Nexus, read as follows:

QUESTION: Has anyone else seen the misinformation about sense pins and 600w magic unlock from anyone other than GamersNexus and Guru3D or is this just these two websites? I have to throw Nvidia some links showing them how confused the user…and the press…are about their smart pins.

Total bullshit and they don’t even realize it. Yes. The adapter has two sense leads. Yes. The board operates with a single sense wire attached. That’s because it’s a 450W card. This is not because it has the ability to be “unlocked” requiring the second sense wire.

The map just doesn’t know. It’s not smart that way. It only looks for a single sense pin.

In a follow-up video, Gamers Nexus responds to these “bullshit” claims:

EVGA left at the right time: NVIDIA RTX 4090 Founders Deep-Dive (Schlieren, 12-Pin, & Pressure)

While the staff member’s comments weren’t exactly professional, a company rep talking shit privately about members of the media is, as we all bet, nothing new. What compelled Corsair to publicly backtrack on this one, however, was the fact that… Nexus and Guru3D players were right. Up to a point – their claims only apply to Nvidia’s own 4090 cables, not those made by third parties like ASUS or Corsair, which may explain the confusion here – but technically correct is still correct.

All of this prompted Corsair to post a formal apology on the company’s social media, which goes so far as to call the employee’s comments an “explosion”:

It has come to our attention that a Corsair staff member recently made inflammatory and incorrect comments regarding Gamers Nexus and Guru3D’s understanding of the Nvidia RTX 4090 power connector.

These comments do not represent Corsair as a company, and we regret both the form and content of the individual’s outrage.

We have worked with Gamers Nexus and Guru3D for many years and both hold ourselves in high regard in terms of professional conduct and technical ability.

We unreservedly apologize for the inappropriate conduct of our employee and will take steps internally to remind our team of the high standards we hold for them when interacting with the media and end users.

For their part, the Gamers Nexus have accepted the apology, and are ready to “move forward”:

EIC Hilbert Hagedoorn from Guru3D said“Guys, it’s the web; everyone has opinions. He was wrong, he apologizes, and for me, that’s the end of this story.

It’s very funny to me that these companies keep taking pictures on Gamers Nexus when their videos turn out to be exactly right! If you’re more technical and want a more detailed explanation of what exactly led to all of this – it’s really a small detail in the grand scheme of things –the best summary I found is here.

A sequel may be on the horizon, but there’s still plenty of gameplay left in The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. Half a decade after its release, gamers are still finding new ways to crack Nintendo’s open-world RPG. Just this week, glitch hunters discovered what might be the most game-changing exploit yet: it’s now possible to rewrite weapon modifiers.

Released in 2017, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild is arguably the crown jewel of the Nintendo Switch. Unlike many similar games, including previous Legend of Zelda entries and BotW’s own open-world contemporaries, the game gives you a toolkit and a playground and lets you go wild, with very little constraints.

This has spawned a highly collaborative community whose members have spent the past five years chasing glitches, designing exploits, and pushing the game to the brink, all while building on each other’s shared knowledge. (The largest shared information base is a massive code decompilation project led by Zelda’s reverse engineer Leoelitinowhich has spurred a host of new discoveries.) Over the years, gamers have learned to “jump to infinity”. They have open “impossible” chests. They even have figured out how to swipe on the map.

The particular problem depends on another method called inventory location transfer (IST). Discovered last month by BotW glitch-hunter zxrobin, IST allows you to move items between save files, meaning you can, for example, start a new game with some of the best weapons in the game. (WMT) takes things a step further, allowing you to imbue weapons in save files with staggering stat bonuses, all without modifying or hacking the game. However, you need to collect a bunch of items from kitchen. Here’s a quick look courtesy of BotW glitch-hunter El Duende 5:

Nintendo / El Duende 5

“This is probably going to be the most game-changing glitch ever,” one YouTube commenter said.

“They’re probably not wrong,” El Duende told Kotaku on Discord.

Some of the results to date have confirmed this claim. The players have created broadswords that turn into cyclones:

When upgraded, Link’s trusty Master Sword is virtually unstoppable, even do odd jobs high level enemies in Hyrule Castle:

Nintendo / El Duende 5

But El Duende says the arc of light is probably the most unstoppable weapon to upgrade, as it has infinite ammo and is unaffected by BotW notorious weapon durability feature.

El Duende says that a full tutorial for WMT is not yet available, as the BotW community has yet to iron out a few issues and discern a full understanding of the issue. But the basic steps are to force the IST exploit to apply the effects of Link’s culinary concoctions to the weapons in your key item slots.

“What happens with IST is that you can prevent the game from deleting a certain number of items from your inventory each time you load another file,” he said.

First, make sure you have 60 meals (the max under typical conditions) and two key items, and have negated any empty inventory slots between your meals tab and the specific item you want to improve. When you load your next save file, it will apply the effects of the meal to whatever item is in the last key item slot.

Players, including famous speedrunner Zelda Satougashi, are compiling “recipes” for weapons. One Endura Carrot plus four Raw Gourmet Meats grant a bonus to the durability of a shield. (Add this to the Hylian Shield to push its rating above 1160.) A mighty thistle and four raw gourmet meats, meanwhile, can add a scattering effect to your bows; here is a player who uses it to eliminate two guardian enemies with devastating powers with a single blow:

It’s a new technique, one that players are still trying to master, but it’s perhaps the ultimate in the broad canon of BotW glitching.

“There’s not much left to be desired,” said El Duende, pointing to the wide range of discoveries made in the game over the past five years. It’s hard to imagine what else could be there.

An untitled Breath of the Wild sequel is on the way, originally slated for this year but now slated for next year following a delay in March. Nintendo is keeping the game’s official name secret; Apparently, the subtitle is a kind of spoiler. Whatever its final name, BotW 2 doesn’t need to be much more than “more BotW” to earn critical acclaim and sell 80 billion copies, but it remains to be seen what effect its release might have on the most dedicated members of the BotW Community.

“I’m a little worried that Nintendo is looking at all of this and they’re going to tighten things up to the point of making the game less fun,” El Duende said. “But I also think whatever happens we will find other stuff like we did with the first game. It’s just a matter of time.”

Image: Drinkbox Studios

nobody saves the world is a game about filling up meters, leveling up and watching the numbers grow. At first I didn’t think it quite worked for me, but like a video game’s equivalent of an earworm crawling through my gray matter, it wasn’t long before the hours ticked away. begin to pass without me even realizing it. It’s a testament to the finesse of the combat and exploration in the game, which never lasts more than a few minutes without something new to discover, kill or upgrade, even if the overall experience can sometimes feel like binge on empty calories.

In 2013, Toronto-based indie developer Drinkbox Studios launched Guacamele!, a dynamic side-scrolling Metroidvania that was as much a button-beater as it was a brain maze navigator. Drinkbox had released a few games before that, but it was the lucha-libre-inspired platformer that put the studio on the map. Then Drinkbox spent most of the years trapped by its own success, releasing ports, remasters, and a sequel (although action adventure swipe-fest Severed was a welcome detour). With Nobody Saves the World, out January 20 on Xbox, Game Pass, and Steam, the studio’s 10-year history has been funneled into an ambitious new structure that excels in new areas without losing Drinkbox’s idiosyncratic charm and style. .

You play as, surprise, a featureless meat puppet named Person whose special power is a wand he can use to change shape. Need to fit into tight spaces? Become a poisonous mouse. Need to swim in the water? Transform into a mermaid that shoots bubbles. An Evil Calamity threatens the world, and only you can stop it, roaming dungeon after dungeon in search of new powers and special gems that can save the land from untold horrors. Most of the time, you’re crushing hordes of monsters, gaining money and levels, and spending them to increase your powers in a continuous cycle of destruction and progression.

Screenshot: Drinkbox Studios

This feedback loop rests on three pillars. Each form, like the bow-wielding Ranger or the rabbit-breeding Magician, can rank up, unlocking new forms and powers. These powers can be mixed and matched in different forms, so you can, for example, give the Knight’s trample to the Ranger, or the Ranger’s poison damage to the Magician’s army of rabbits. Finally, some enemies have color barriers that can only be broken by certain damage types. It’s a mechanic from the Guacamelee! games that add much-needed depth and difficulty to combat. You can also change forms on the fly, expanding your options to take on even more waves of enemies and boss fights. Just when you think you’ve become overpowered, a new combination of enemies and shields will force you to get creative again and find a new strategy.

Rather than leveling up just to kill stuff, you do so by completing specific challenges like killing 50 enemies with poison. Like a well-calibrated battle pass, Nobody Saves the World continues to subtly shift your goals alongside your evolving arsenal. But instead of working hard in exchange for cosmetic trinkets, you work to unlock more fun and efficient ways to progress through the game, which, unlike the purgatory of a live treadmill, has an end.

Screenshot: Drinkbox Studios

If you enjoy filling up meters and testing out creative new builds to effectively dispatch enemy mobs, like me, this is a recipe for several long nights of fun. Drinkbox has tried to keep boredom to a minimum by making new milestones happen quickly and often. Dungeons that you might have to grind a handful of times before taking down a larger boss subtly remix each time in a roguelite fashion so they feel more like theme park rides than prisons.

Nobody Saves The World’s map is also full of side quests and NPCs to distract you and send you on brief excursions deeper into its bizarre world. None of the ones I encountered felt particularly outstanding (I’m close to halfway through the game), but they add variety to the all-you-can-eat buffet. And that’s not to mention The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past’s jaw-dropping reimagining of an old-school-style overworld, and composer Jim Guthrie’s excellent soundtrack.

Nobody saves the world can feel like you’re being overwhelmed at times. In addition to its density and repetitiveness, each enemy you kill rewardingly explodes into coins and health refills, and each new challenge you complete carries a glowing seal of approval. Binging works when you never feel full, and with Nobody Saves the World, I felt stuffed at times, but after I had time to calm down again, I always wanted to come back for more. I only wish some of my favorite hit RPGs could track their progress so closely.